Valentine’s Day is supposed to be a romantic event; a time to get and give gifts from those you love and highlight the value of your marriage and your spouse. Unfortunately, valentine’s day can be a lot like some wedding days; the romantic expectations are so great that disappointment, rejection and hurt feelings can end up ruling the day. Marriage therapists Bob & Sheri Stritoff offer some advice to couples about how skipping Valentine’s Day can actually help their marriage.
The article is called “No Flowers?” and it offers some great help in making this valentine’s Day a great one for your marriage, especially if Valentines aren’t your best thing.
As Bob and Sheri point out, people have mixed feeling about celebrating Valentine’s Day.
Some think it is over commercialized and puts too much pressure on people buying cards, flowers, candy, expensive dinners, etc. Others say it is a lovely holiday to remind one another of the love that is felt between two people.”
However, they go on to explain that there are quite a few couples, very happy couples, who don’t celebrate Valentine’s day at all.
An Associated Press article written by Carolyn Thompson, mentions a couple who had been married for 80 years, and who had not ever celebrated Valentine’s Day.”
They also post a letter from a reader (a woman at that!) who said that she’d decided to give up Valentine’s Day, for several very logical-sounding reasons. Apparently, skipping Valentine’s day isn’t all that uncommon and some couples actually seem to be happier for it.
So can skipping Valentine’s day actually help your marriage and be the way for both of you to escape the pressure of the holiday and the possible disappointment if it doesn’t meet some romantic ideal?
Can getting rid of Valentine’s Day actually be a good idea?
According to the Stritoffs, it can, but only if both of you agree to it and expect it. Talk to your spouse about skipping Valentine’s Day and all the pressure and expenses that goes with it and bringing more romance into the rest of the year instead.