Some Thoughts on The Marriage Advice “Hope Springs” Got Right

A few weeks ago, we posted on some great romantic movies to catch before summer’s over. One of the most anticipated movies of the year, for me, has been “Hope Springs“, with Tommy Lee Jones and Meryl Streep. Not only is it a grown-up movie about a long-married couple who puts the passion back in their marriage, but it also has Tommy Lee Jones, which has never hurt anything.

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We haven’t had a chance to see “Hope Springs” yet, but I did just gleefully read the Huffington Post piece, “Marriage Advice: What ‘Hope Springs’ Got Right” and wanted to share it with you.

As the article says, “Hope Springs” did one thing right just by existing; it portrays a couple who are in a less than intimate relationship and shows them finding their way back to a passionate marriage.

The AARP’s intimacy and relationship expert, Pepper Schwartz, says that’s not all.

The couple also seek professional help to help them build a healthier marriage and reclaim their passionate relationship.

I think it’s very, very hard to reconnect if you’ve let this situation exist for more than months into years,” she said. “It’s very wise to get a third party involved — I’m a big believer this is the best way to melt this glacial block that forms around each person.”

Much of the movie is focused on the therapy sessions that the couple go through with a famous marital counselor.

Through the course of the movie, we get to watch how that therapy plays out, and apparently it’s fairly realistic, even if it is often funny.

These sessions can get very tough,” and can include a lot of personal insults, Schwartz continued. “You want somebody to sort of say, ‘Where does this come from, doesn’t it come from pain? It’s very hard if it’s just the two of you to have the maturity to say, ‘That hurtful comment is coming from a place of pain, let’s explore that.’”

Apparently, the movie includes an awful lot of laughs, but it does respectfully and beautifully treat the story of this couple who has lost the excitement in their marriage and love each other enough to try to rekindle the passion.

Personally, we love that it shows this older couple as vital, charming, attractive people who can still get a fire going when they put their hearts and minds to it. Hollywood doesn’t do us any favors when it portrays that anyone over forty or married for more than twenty years should expect to have a boring, platonic marriage. By showing these actors (and their characters) as romantic and exciting people, this movie does us all some good.

One Response to Some Thoughts on The Marriage Advice “Hope Springs” Got Right

  1. Cathy Lorient August 20, 2012 at 1:39 am #

    How do you find “Hope Springs” marriage advice? How would you apply it to your own marriage? Please post your thoughts below.

    – Cathy Lorient

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